Young hearts, uncertain aspirations

I, like every other college kid and graduating high school Senior, am a dreamer. In terms of comparison.. I'd like to suppose I'm greater a dreamer compared to quite a number of my peers. Is there a means, however, to measure the degree of ambitions sought after? Perhaps, one day, Steven Levitt and Stephen Dubne (two astonishing authors and economists) may someday devote an entire chapter to this subject, but at present, there is no means of assessing such. So if you were to be rather kind and if you were to trust me, believe me when I say I am indeed a bigger dreamer, and frankly, it freaks the crap out of myself.

I resolved to write this post and do a lot of soulful thinking so that by the end of this, I may be able to arise with an adequate and rational resolution. For.. the young hearts that exist today that have an entire list of ambitions to select from. For those who can't quite make up their minds. For those who.. are idealists but have boundaries to sucker punch them in the face (believe me, it wounds more than it's ironically funny). So I fancied the best way to approach this is by figuring out my own issues. Let's begin with the basics and what I want.

• I'm currently taking AB Communication Arts in Iloilo but I wish to shift to Manila.
• I desire to study Film in France (Lol. But no, for real)
• I want to be a travel journalist.
• I'm considering remaining in Iloilo and finishing my course here so that my parents can save up enough money to send me to:
• a) USC (my dream school) for Masters in Communication Arts
• b) Law School
• I want to be an Independent Film director/producer
• I want to take up a Science Undergrad because I know it would be an adept pre-law degree.
• I can finish my course in Manila and just get Masters years after when I save my own money.
• I want to take a year off so that my parents can save and I can travel around, get in touch with my artistic side.. (parents wouldn't quite agree though)

See how many troubles I face? And they completely contradict one another, it's kind of freaking me out. Which one do I pursue? Which one will actually answer to majority of my bucket-list? If you form a list right now and compare, I'm certain there would be a couple of things that contradict. I, for instance, want to be a travel journalist, but I likewise want to be a lawyer. I'm not quite sure how that'll work, so I'd have to pick one, right? No? There's no definite response to that.

I wish I could avoid saying this succeeding statement, but there's a reason clichés are cliché, because they're impossibly dead on target: Set your priorities straight. It's subservient to pick a path that would be flexible enough to add or rid other interests/concerns. So I may just wind up in Manila. While I'm there I could pursue my passion for art. I could also apply in the exchange student program. And then upon graduating, I get out, pursue a vocation in journalism, go to Law School in USC and would you look at that.. I got to cross out a great deal already. But.. as we all know it, the unavoidable laws of nature will discover a way to fit into my plan and somehow alter my course of action. In a world right now where people struggle for practicality and impracticality; pursuing the course you really want, or opting one that provides an assurance of stability.. It's difficult to know if the stakes are high for us. It doesn't matter if you have the most thought out plan for yourself, the forces of nature will attempt to modify it, because let's face it, the world sucks sometimes and there must be some sort of divinity (not pertaining to any faith, no premature discernments) that basks in poking our arses with what might be his/her variation of a knife-like toothpick.

So perhaps the solution is that there isn't one. Not to break your hearts, but it's simply the only conclusion I can surface with. There's no way to to be certain concerning what we want to achieve. We can only at the very least plan out what we want in our life and hope they turn out the way we wish it to. It's a gamble, going to this place, choosing a course, attempting to try something new. The gamble is risky but it's also very exciting. If you end up going to Manila and realizing on graduation that you can't go to USC for Masters, then you can't turn back and wish you resolved to continue in Iloilo. You can't fight the injustice of fate; you can only suffer with it and hope that one day.. it might be different.

You can not.. you simply just can not fight the injustice of fate. You can only suffer with it and hope that one day.. it just might be rather different.